Do you have haters? You’re about to! Because ALL lockboxes, including the new Black Lockbox and uber-rare Animal Control lockbox, are now on sale. 

Let them mewl in nuclear jealousy at how amazingly the light of the sun—filtered through the mustard-haze of latent gamma particles—reflects off of your shiny new Gimp Suit. Savor their hatorade-and-iodione-flavored tears as they beg to hang out with you that you’ve got a badass new Pet Sasquatch. Or simply ignore them all from the plush confines of your pimped out new Mascot Head mask. 

So Grab a few of the Lockboxes now, and give the future post-apocalyptic version of haters something to really hate on. Do it quickly though – this opportunity won’t last forever.